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Joseph DuPriest was five years old when he first felt the hand of God upon him. Like some children, he had heard about God, but he was not taken to church. His parents had died in an automobile accident when he was four. After that, he lived with his grandparents. His grandmother would tell him, "Joseph, you wash your hands now. God doesn't like dirty hands at the table." She would say things to him like, "Joseph, you must be good. God doesn't like bad little boys." If he was particularly good that day, she would tuck him in that night and say, "Joseph, you were very good today. God and His angels are smiling at you." But, she never took him to church, so his knowledge of God extended only to the references his grandmother made. Joseph could still vividly remember the day he met God. He was lying beneath a huge pine tree in the meadow near where his grandparents lived. He had ventured farther than usual that day, and had stopped to rest before going back home. He had asthma, and was beginning to feel an attack coming on. He was tired from running. The wind was blowing very hard, and breathing was becoming difficult. He could feel his heart beginning to race. Joseph began to panic, his fear coming from having had attacks like this before. He did not have his medication with him, and he was frightened. Due to his difficulty in breathing, he knew he could not make it back home, or even call out for help from his grandfather, who was supposed to have been watching him. Joseph remembered stopping to sit beneath the tree, then lying back, hoping he would be able to breathe better. He remembered closing his eyes, tossing and turning, as he began to lose his ability to breathe. Suddenly, he felt a slight pressure on his arm. It was as though someone had laid a hand on his shoulder. He thought he heard someone say, "Lie still, Joseph." He opened his eyes, but he did not see anyone. He saw clouds moving above his head, and saw the tree being swayed by the wind. He lay very still. He felt calmer, and his pulse began to beat steadier. In a few moments, he was able to stand and walk back through the meadow to his grandparents' house. He smiled as he looked up into the sky. Even though he was only five years old, Joseph DuPriest knew he had felt the hand of God touch him, helping him in his time of need. From that day on, he felt very special, as though he was being watched over by an unseen being. He did not tell anyone about the experience right away, but kept it to himself for quite some time. He would always count that day as the beginning of his personal relationship with the Almighty. Laughter was the weapon Joseph chose early in life to enable him to deal with his childhood years. Things were not easy for him, having lost his parents at such a young age. His life was quite different from the other children's, not only because he didn't have his parents, but that he had to be careful what he did in order not to bring on an asthma attack. His grandparents were not wealthy, and Joseph learned early not to long for things he couldn't have, but to be content with what he had. As it turned out, it was a good policy, one that he kept for his entire life. Even though he eventually outgrew the problem of childhood asthma, he kept to self-discipline and moderation in most avenues of his life. He understood about the frailty of life, and he carried this with him from his youth to his later years. Having suffered illness as a child, Joseph learned to have compassion for others who were not healthy, or were afflicted in some other way. There are people who clown all the time, sometimes at the expense of others. Joseph was not that way, even as a child. Even though he laughed a lot, his sensitivity to people showed, especially in his laughter. If he saw someone in a situation that was making them uncomfortable or embarrassed, he went out of his way to change to a lighter note, usually finding a way to put a smile back on the faces of those involved. It was no wonder that Joseph was either liked, or loved, by those who knew him. As he grew older, his love and his knowledge of the Lord strengthened. Joseph hardly ever missed a Sunday at church. He gave his life to the Lord, and when he was older, he committed himself to becoming a minister to bring others to know Christ. After he was ordained, Joseph preached whenever and wherever he could. While preaching at one of the churches, he met Eva Simmons. They dated for almost one year, then, they married. Eva, like Joseph, loved the Lord, and wanted to serve Him. Together, they began a ministry. A local retailer offered them a community room to use for their services. At first, the room was adequate; however, the numbers coming to hear Joseph preach grew rapidly. Joseph was grateful for the space provided by the retailer, but realized they would soon need a larger space. He and Eva had begun to pray diligently for God's will in providing a larger building. Their ministry was without affiliation with other churches. Therefore, the church received no financial support from any of the denominations. Joseph felt led by God to start a church, preaching from the Bible alone, using life's lessons he had learned from it. He also used examples from the experiences of others that he knew of from his years of Christian counseling. Joseph DuPriest was affectionately called Pastor Joe by his congregation. The Lord had blessed Joseph and Eva with two sons. Paul was the oldest, and Joey came along a year later. After Joey was born, Pastor Joe kidded with the congregation that he and Eva were growing the church and everyone needed to pray for the Lord to provide a larger space. The truth was that they hardly had room for those who came to hear him preach, and the church was continuing to grow. This had been one of those rare Sundays when Joseph was struggling to get through his sermon. There were so many thoughts going through his head, he wasn't sure what avenue to take next. All at once, Joseph felt the hand of God upon him. He closed his eyes while making the altar call, and suddenly, the familiar touch was there. He stood, pleading the case for Christ, as he always did, at the end of his sermon. When he felt God's touch, he waited for the word he knew God was about to give him. The Lord gave him the word - forgiveness. Upon hearing the word from the Lord, he announced that God was particularly calling that day for hearts to be mended, but that it would have to begin with forgiveness. He knew that God was dealing with someone at that moment. He asked for that person, or persons, to come forward so he could pray with them. When he opened his eyes, the altar was filled with people who were convicted by the Holy Spirit to come forward. They were seeking prayer to help them to forgive, and some to ask forgiveness for themselves. They wanted the new and clean heart that was being offered them by God through his messenger, Joseph DuPriest. "Thank you, Lord, for these people who have given their lives to you today," said Joseph, as he sat alone in his makeshift study, half an hour after the altar call. "Thank you that you come to me when I need you. Thank you that, even when I am at a loss for the right words, Father, you never are. I am so thankful that you taught me at an early age to listen for your voice." He looked up as he heard Eva knocking on the study door. "Hold on a second. I'm coming, Eva," he said, as he rose from his desk to go to the door. "Let's get those boys and go have some lunch," he said, smiling at his wife, as he took her arm. "We have five new members as of this morning, sweetheart. Five new souls committed to serving Christ," he announced to his wife, with a big smile. "I am so happy to have five new members, Joe. Remind me, though, to order some more chairs. Have you noticed that we are running out of chairs, as well as a place to put them?" "It's a good problem to have, Eva, dear. But, we must continue to pray that God will provide a larger building. He keeps sending us souls to save. They will need chairs to sit in or the souls will be standing on their soles," he chuckled. Eva laughed along with him, at his little pun. The next day at the church began with a paper cut. Making her way down the hall to get a bandage from the first aid kit, Anna, Pastor Joe's secretary, noticed a light under the door to his study. The study was usually locked, but now it stood slightly open. It was much too early for the pastor to be there. Tentatively, Anna eased open the door, believing she was the only person in the building. The strangest sight lay before her eyes. In the pastor's chair were his pants, upright, as though the Pastor were sitting there. The shirt was folded so that the elbow was draped on the corner of the desk, just as the pastor always sat when working on his Sunday sermon. After a jolt to her system, Anna realized this display was acting out of the joke Pastor Joe always made. He would tease that he worked so much at his desk, one day the Rapture would occur as he was working, and someone would look for him and find only his clothing. At the moment she started to smile broadly, she heard laughter coming from behind the door. Pulling the door open wider, Anna saw Pastor Joe with his hand over his mouth, trying not to laugh out loud. He had to dodge, as Anna could not resist swatting at him with the papers in her hand, as she laughed along with him at his early morning joke. The day that had begun on an unexpected note with a paper cut was continued with the usual laughter and sense of humor of the well-loved pastor. This day was to be one of the times when Joseph realized he would need to use the sensitivity and compassion given him by God. He was meeting with Paula Chance, a young wife and mother whose life had taken a sharp turn, as he was told, not for the better. Her two year old son, Sam, had died, suddenly, from complications of a high fever. Joseph did not know Paula or her son, however, he had been asked to meet with her by a friend of hers who was a member of his church. Joseph returned to his study that afternoon, closed the door, and went to a chair in his favorite place by the window to pray for the meeting that would occur within the hour. "Dear Heavenly Father," Joseph prayed. "Please clear my mind, and my heart of all things concerning myself. Father, leave only space for me to concentrate on the sorrow of my sister in Christ Jesus, who is coming to me for counsel. Please give me the words that you would have her hear, as if she were coming to you, kneeling at your feet, and pouring out her problems to you. Let my eyes see, my ears hear, and my lips speak only wisdom divined from you, my Heavenly Father. I pray this, in the name of Jesus. Amen." As Joseph rose from his knees in his place of prayer by the window, he glanced out to see a young woman getting out of an automobile. He noticed, as she walked towards the entry, that her face was sad, and she was very thin. She was walking slowly up the walk, with her hands clasped together in front of her. Pastor Joe took a deep breath, put his faith in God, and went to greet her. He stepped to the entry in time to open the door for the young woman, as she entered the building. He extended his hand to her. "Good morning. I am Pastor Joseph DuPriest. Everyone calls me Pastor Joe." She reached out and took the hand he offered. He noticed how frail her hand felt in his own. "I am Paula Chance. Thank you for agreeing to see me today." "I understand that one of our members suggested you meet with me," said Pastor Joe. "Won't you join me in my study, so we can talk privately?" Paula Chance looked into his kind face, and slightly shook her head. He opened the door for her and indicated that she sit on the sofa. He took a seat opposite her in a chair. For a brief moment, there was no exchange of words, only the sound of their breathing was heard in the room. Then, Pastor Joe reached and took her hand. "It goes without saying that I am sorry for the loss of your young son," he began. "But, I know in my heart that you did not come here today for sympathy. I believe you came for answers." Looking up at Pastor Joe, Paula slowly nodded her head to indicate that he was correct about what he had said. She spoke only one word, softly, with a frown forming on her face. "Why?" This was the one question that Pastor Joe had anticipated. Having served as a pastor for many years, he had heard that question over and over from loved ones when someone died unexpectedly. He had pondered the same thing, after losing his parents when he was a young child. He knew there was only one way to answer her question. It was the only truth about a sudden death that he, or anyone else, for that matter, could honestly give. "We do not know why, Mrs. Chance. Nobody but God truly knows why. If I told you anything other than that, I would be inventing reasons that could not hold water." Mrs. Chance looked at him, quizzically. The answer he had just given her was not at all what she had anticipated. "The Bible tells us in Ecclesiastes that, "To everything there is a season and a time for every purpose under heaven: - a time to be born and a time to die." I believe that every person has an appointed time to die, the time known only to God Himself. And, the reason they are to die at their appointed time is His reason alone, as well. In time, all will be revealed to us that know Him. Are you a believer, Mrs. Chance?" "Oh, yes, Pastor Joe. I believe in the Lord, with all my heart. It's funny, but I haven't felt the anger at Him some people say they have when they have lost someone. I just have all these unanswered questions. Why did he take Sam? He was only two years old. He never had a chance to live. He was doing fine, until the morning he got that awful fever. They couldn't get the fever to break. Then, he lost consciousness and never recovered." Tears began to flow down Paula's cheeks. Pastor Joe patted her hand and said, "I wish I had answers that could soothe you. I wish I could just tell you what some ministers say. That the child was such an angel, that God couldn't live in Heaven without him any longer, and called him back to be with Him there. Mrs. Chance, I can't tell you that, because I don't know that to be true. That's what you are looking for here this morning, isn't it? The truth about why Sam died." "Yes, that is what I need to know, in my heart." Pastor Joe looked into her eyes and said, "Maybe we don't know why, but God had a reason for allowing it to happen. There is a reason. One that, because you love the Lord, you will one day know. By faith alone, you need to believe that one fact. God loves Sam, and He loves you. He knows your grief, and He wants you to come to Him for comfort. You have been grieving for quite some time, I understand." "A year and a half," she answered softly. "I have gone to other ministers, to counselors, and it's a funny thing, you know. Some of them told me just what you said you wouldn't tell me. About Sam being such a little angel, that God wanted him back with Him." "Do you know, Pastor Joe, that statement has kept me up walking the floor many nights, wondering if the God I love would be so cruel to give me my baby for two years to love and cherish, only to know He planned all along to take him back. If that was true, then that would mean He put me through this anguish intentionally," Paula said. She covered her face with her hands, as she finished talking. Pastor Joe kept silent, knowing she was on her way to recovery. She had begun to talk about losing Sam. She was not willing to accept all the things she had been told to accept, as to the reason she lost her child, the things that didn't make any sense to her. He knew that the healing process had to begin with her being able to talk about Sam's dying, openly, seeking answers to her confusion and her pain. "Why, one counselor even told me that something was going to happen to Sam in the future that would have been so devastating, that God went ahead and took him early, to save everyone the additional grief," Paula said. She looked at Pastor Joe, and shrugged her shoulders. "Whatever that means," she said. "But, that bothered me too. Not only did I have to think about losing Sam, but being in the emotional state I have been in, I started lying awake at night, imaging what terrible things might have happened to him, if he had lived." Paula sat looking at Pastor Joe, shaking her head slowly. "Pastor Joe, that is so hard to swallow. Those reasons they kept giving me. You know what else? I had come to the conclusion that it was because of something I did wrong, that, I didn't deserve to have that sweet child. That, maybe God was punishing me for something I should have done, or something I actually did." She began to sob, overcome by all the thoughts she had swirling in her head, about the loss of her child. Pastor Joe shook his head and lifting her face with his fingers, wiped away her tears. "Mrs. Chance," he said. "Can you accept that we just won't truly know the answer of why while we are still here on earth? That God doesn't have children die to inflict punishment on the parents? That's not my God. That's not the loving, caring Father God I know. Do you truly picture God that way?" "No, I don't," said Paula, softly, slowly shaking her head. "I know our God to be a loving God. I know there will come a judgment. And, in my heart of hearts, I found it difficult to believe He would punish me for my sins by taking Sam." "Can you accept what I am telling you now as the truth, Mrs. Chance?" "Pastor Joe, please, just call me Paula." "Then, Paula, can you accept, in faith, that there was a reason? Can you also accept that you won't know that reason until the day God Himself reveals it to you? If you can do that, you can get past this and go on with your life, remembering Sam as the sweet little boy he was. Recognizing that, it does hurt beyond anyone's understanding other than your own, and begin to deal with it on that level?" "It's the only answer I have been given that makes any sense. I can honestly tell you right now that I feel better, hearing you say the loving things about God today. Hearing you tell me that maybe there aren't going to be any answers about why right away. That may seem strange to you, but it does seem easier to handle than all the suppositions I have been put through by some of your learned colleagues." "Then, if you accept that one fact, Paula, please understand when I tell you this one, as well. I told you before, that in Ecclesiastes it says, "There is a time and a purpose for everything under heaven." That goes for grieving, too. You have grieved for Sam for a year and a half. The fact is, you are still here. Your husband is still here. Your other two children are still here. You need to acknowledge them, and to start a new life, a different life than when Sam was here, but a new life that includes them. And, especially one that includes yourself." Paula wiped away the tears on her face and blew her nose with the tissues that Pastor Joe handed her. She looked at him and said, "You know, that is the one thing I think I have felt guilty about. That I get to see the sun come up every day, smell the new grass mowed in the park, feel the wind on my face, the things that Sam loved." "That's very normal to feel that way, Paula. But, there is also a reason God left you here. There are things He wants you to do. You have a life to live. There are people who need you. Yes, you need to remember Sam. Cry when you need to. But, Paula, remember those who are still here, and, that includes you, as well." "I realize that I have neglected my family in my own grief, Pastor Joe. I hide away in my room. I make someone else answer the door when my well-meaning friends come by to see me. As I sit here right now, I feel a peace from God that has begun to well up in my soul. But, along with that peace about Sam, I have to admit that I have been remiss in my duties to my family." Paula kept her head down and her eyes closed as she spoke these words. "Well, Paula, you have now acknowledged that you have left them out. From this moment on, put that time in your life behind you. If you tell them how you have been feeling, and that you are sorry you have left them out of your grieving, you will see that they understand. In fact, your daughter is the one who asked your friend to see if you would come visit with me. She has been very concerned, even though she is so young." Paula looked up, surprised at what Pastor Joe was saying about her daughter having asked for help for her. Noting her surprise, he continued. "So as you step out the front door, see the sun, smell the new grass that was mowed fresh this morning, and feel the breeze that is blowing out there. Think about your family and what you can do for them today. The most important thing in their lives right now is to have you back. The wife, the mother, and the friend they are all missing. Can you do that, Paula?" Paula took a deep breath and held her head up high, looking at the ceiling. "You know, I would have thought it impossible when I came up that walk this morning, but yes, I think I can do that." "As I said, it is strange, but I feel the peace of God around me at this very moment. I know He can get me through this. And, you are right. I have to go on living. I have been living, but it was as though everything has been about my grief. I have examined every reason I could think of and every reason someone gave me as to why Sam had to die." "As I sit here, I really feel ashamed of the fact that, though my family has been so supportive, I have not shown them much in the past eighteen months except my own tears. They hurt, too. I pray that God will let me say and do the right things from this very moment to put things back together, so we can go forward." The words Paula spoke at the end of the conversation were those Pastor Joe had been waiting to hear. He knew, without a doubt, that God had given him the right words to say to Paula. He knew she was reacting to what God gave him to say to this grieving mother. The words were of a loving Father, comforting his child in her hour of need. Pastor Joe waited until Paula had finished talking and then said, "Paula, please let me pray with you now." Paula reached and took both of Pastor Joe's hands in her own and said, "I am ready, Pastor Joe." "Our dear and gracious heavenly Father," Pastor Joe began. "Thank you for your holy presence with us here in this room today. Thank you, Lord, that Paula believes in you and acknowledges that there are just simply things in life that happen, for which we cannot possibly know the reasons. But, that you do, Father. And, you are in control of our lives, if we will only allow you to be. I pray now that Paula will continue to feel your Holy Spirit bringing peace into her life. For, Lord, you are the Great Comforter." "I pray that she will walk in your presence, not only this day, but for the rest of her days. That her family will sense the peace you have given her, and that their lives will be enriched as a family from this day forward. In the name of Jesus, we ask these things. Amen." Pastor Joe accompanied Paula to her car. He asked her to keep in touch with him, and invited her to bring her family to church on Sunday morning. Paula assured him that was something she would really like to do. As she drove away, Pastor Joe walked over to a park bench that had been placed underneath a large oak tree. The bench was beautifully carved, with an inscription reading, "With God, All Things Are Possible." The bench had been donated by a church member who had received an answer from the Lord to a problem that was seemingly insurmountable. Pastor Joe noticed how the seat on the bench was worn from people stopping by to sit on the bench and pray. He thought about Paula Chance. He again prayed that she would come to realize what the inscription on the bench meant to her in her present situation. He thought of the responsibility he had in shepherding his flock. He thought of their need for a larger building. So many in his congregation had problems in their lives, and he constantly prayed for the Lord to give him the wisdom and strength to counsel and lead them. He thought of his own life, his wife and children. He began to thank God for all he had been given. |
